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Chapter 7
The three-day midterm exams were over.
They were the first major set of exams since I’d started high school. Until a little while ago, I’d felt some nervousness. Having entered at the top of my class, I felt a strange kind of pressure, and my parents had come to expect excellence as if it were only natural.
I wasn’t good at making friends──or rather, I couldn't recall ever being able to do so like a normal person. For me, school wasn’t really a fun place. Of course, I knew it was my own fault for having such a disposition.
There was one person I’d known since enrollment. But because of an incident in middle school, we’d grown quite distant, and then after the incident a month after starting high school, the crack widened into something enormous……
'…No. There’s no need to think about that man.'
Ŵ е̄b̊n̄о̂ v е l̇ Е̃ n̂_u̇ m̂ а́
I cut off that pointless line of thought.
Right now, I had a friend──no, a comrade. It was a relationship between two people licking their wounds together. A boy who’d go along with a contract as ridiculous as pseudo-romance.
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Just being with him made my days feel completely different. At the same time, it gave me a reason to want to go to school.
Midterms ended in the morning. That was the same for the regular classes and the special advancement classes.
Up until yesterday, we hadn’t been able to meet because there was test prep for the next day…… but today I was completely free.
“Hehe.”
Е̇ ń ũ m̃а̀ .і̃ d
As I walked down the hallway, I opened my phone and checked whether I’d gotten any messages from him.
Of course, we’d already made plans to meet after this. It hadn’t been long since I’d started opening my phone for reasons other than business contact, yet I still felt as giddy as a child. I wasn’t confident I could properly use this latest smartphone my parents had given me, but it felt like some entirely new function had been added, and I found myself checking it more than I strictly needed to.
Even now──.
“……!”
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A message arrived. But the name shown in the notification wasn’t the person I’d been hoping for. It belonged to that man I didn’t even want to see.
My buoyant mood plummeted. And after I read the content of the message, it dropped even further.
Ẇ е b̄ ǹ ӧ vе̊ l̇ E n̈ ū m a
I struggled with it for just a moment…… and first, I contacted him—Watanuki-kun.
“Haa……”
Without even trying to hide a heavy sigh, my mood swung from the absolute best to the absolute worst.
◆
I first met that man sometime around before I entered elementary school.
Shibaki Soichi—the son of my father’s friend, Shibaki Hajime.
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“Sachika, he’s your fiancé.”
Now, I thought. Ah, what a terrible father, honestly.
For reasons like “we promised before you were even born,” he was trying to marry his daughter off to a man she barely knew. In every sense, it was beyond out of touch with the times.
But back then, my first thought was, What’s “fiancé”? And after I got a proper explanation, I only thought, Oh, I see. Marriage was still such a distant thing.
Still, Soichi’s parents—Hajime-san and Minako-san—were very kind, and they took care of me, and the prospect of becoming part of their family made the idea of marriage seem not just tolerable, but actually quite pleasant.
And then──.
Ē n ûm̈а̊.i d
“Honestly, Sachika, you can’t help it, can you?”
“B-but, bugs……”
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“Here, it’s okaaay now.”
Even as he sighed at me for being scared of the bug that flew into the room, the one who caught it with a tissue and released it outside was……Soichi.
When we’d first met, Soichi had been a dazzling presence to me.
His smile was gentle, he was amazing at sports, reliable──and kind.
E̊ nǔ m а̌ .іď
He didn’t just get rid of bugs I couldn’t handle. He chased off the bullies who made fun of me, held my hand on the way home, and when I was lonely on days my parents weren’t around, he played with me and spent time with me.
Whether or not I, as a little girl, had romantic feelings for him… I couldn’t tell anymore, and there was no point thinking about it.
But one thing was certain…… Soichi wasn’t born an evil person.
I’m sure there were times I’d thought, I’m glad he’s my fiancé.
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That was why I’d done my best to become his 'good bride'…… and that was why, even when he did things I thought were “wrong,” I believed that someday he’d return to who he used to be.
He began to change around the final years of elementary school.
Ѐ.ńů m ӑ
“Don’t do that, Soichi-kun. You have to do your homework properly.”
“Who cares. I’ll just copy someone’s tomorrow.”
“You can’t do that. You have to do it yourself.”
“You’re so annoying. Everyone says studying is a waste of time. And besides, being a nerd? That's just lame.”
“You won’t know that until you grow up. If you regret it after you’re an adult, it’ll be too late, you know?”
……We had those ridiculous arguments in all seriousness, almost every day.
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Back then—during what I would later learn was adolescence—boys and girls began to notice each other for better or worse. Soichi started siding with friends who called hanging out with girls lame, and he began acting as if he disliked me.
In response, my own demeanor hardened as well. It’s embarrassing to hide behind the excuse of being a child, but I felt that if Soichi was heading down the wrong path, I had to do whatever it took to set him straight. So, I nagged him with constant lectures.
Naturally, that only made him push back harder—hindsight makes it obvious.
Soichi avoided me, and I wasn’t even trying to truly see Soichi.
He was bound to become a pro tennis player someday, just like his father. He would probably even fly overseas.
As his fiancée—his future partner—it was my job to make up for his shortcomings. I had to support him properly.
W e bn̂ оvе l̄ Е́ṅù m̀а̃
I studied foreign languages and even mastered housework.
If he was running late, I scolded him; if he tried to head out with messy bedhead, I pointed it out in detail every single time...
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And thanks to that, too──.
“Tch, you’re so damn loud.”
That became his favorite refrain. That was just how much I grated on him.
Soichi loathed being engaged to me. He usually hid it from the world, but he was a coward with an oversized ego who hated being scolded—not just by me, but even by his parents.
Е́ nùm â .їd
He seemed to like tennis well enough and practiced properly, but aside from that he was sloppy—and he didn’t show that side to anyone but me.
Hearing that, one might think I was special to him in some way... but that wasn't his intention at all.
In reality, he looked at me—the one person who knew his secrets—with open hatred; perhaps he felt I had leverage over him.
But even so, I still thought that someday, we’d be able to understand each other──no, that he’d come to understand that I’d done it all for his sake. I wanted to believe that.
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That was probably just my self-centered conviction that “I’m right.”
I have plenty to answer for as well. If I’d tried harder to meet him halfway, if I’d truly looked at him and empathized with his feelings... maybe we wouldn't have ended up this way.
E n u mа̂
'If I’d just endured it and obeyed, even when he said something as vile as "If you’re my fiancée, then spread your legs..."'
……It’s too late to think about it now.
To begin with, long before the day Watanuki-kun and I witnessed that decisive scene, an irreparable crack had surely already opened between me and Soichi.
◆
Dragging my leaden feet, I headed to the designated meeting spot behind the tennis courts.
“You’re late.”
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Soichi was there, leaning against the fence; he opened with a complaint immediately.
Still in our uniforms, and there was no one on the courts. During exam period, club activities were suspended, and that applied all the way through today, the final day of exams.
And yet he’d gone out of his way to specify this place……most likely because to him, the tennis courts were his home ground.
Summoning me at his own convenience and choosing his own turf—it was enough to make me snort. It was proof of how small-minded the man was.
That aside, he had no right to call me late. I’d gotten a sudden summons too, and even with my steps so heavy, I’d come straight here.
“What do you want?”
Ẅе b́ n̊ о̊v̄ е l̇ .Eñ u̇ m̃ а
“What do you mean, what? I went out of my way to make time for you.”
“…………”
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I thought, You’re not so pressed for time you need to “make” it, but I stopped myself from saying it out loud. He was the type who thought showing off how “busy” he was looked cool.
“My old man said something. He asked why you didn't come over to help me study before exams like usual. He even started suspecting I'd done something to make you sulk.”
Soichi complained like that. He was big, but in these ways he was childish.
“Suspecting?”
Е̄ñ u ḿa
“Don’t tell me you snitched about that.”
I didn’t understand why he was glaring at me like he was accusing me.
And he should know I still hadn’t told his parents about that—his cheating. If I had told them, it wouldn’t be something that ended at “suspecting,” because there’s no way it would.
Maybe that was why. Why there was a kind of leeway—an indulgence—in his attitude.
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Perhaps he took my silence as proof that I didn’t care about the cheating, or that I had no intention of leaving him regardless. He likely thought I was the one debasing myself.
“Well, since you didn’t teach me, my exams were kinda so-so, or whatever……but that’s fine. Anyway, it’s about time you got over it.”
Ê n̄ üm̃a .і d
Not a single word of that made my heart waver.
Those childish words didn't come close to an apology. They stirred no sympathy in me—not even anger.
I’m sure, in his own way, those were “concessions.” In a sense, you could call it growth. But there was no way I could feel happy about it anymore.
All that remained was emptiness—a hollow void, like I was merely checking the answers to a trivial problem.
'I should’ve ignored him. If I had, I’d be with Watanuki-kun right now...'
Soichi suddenly called me out. The reason I went along with it anyway was to see the current him with my own eyes.
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Even though he had a fiancée, he exchanged a heated kiss with someone else’s girlfriend. From how practiced he seemed, I could tell he'd done this many times before—and likely gone much further than just kissing.
'And to think I was foolish enough to hope that Shibaki Soichi might someday return to being the kind person I first met.'
Back then, I’d let my tears and frustration spill out all at once.
Watanuki-kun had noticed I was hurting, and he was likely right. If Watanuki-kun hadn't been by my side then, I don't know what I would have done…… I was so shaken I couldn't even speak, and I might have even felt like my life wasn't worth living.
It wasn’t that any affection for Soichi had still been smoldering.
My mind was consumed by how to explain things to our parents, or what all the time we'd spent together even meant……
Ѐ ǹ u m а̂
If you stripped away my role as Soichi’s fiancée—a role that felt mandatory—there would be nothing left of my life. The end of our engagement was effectively a total negation of my existence.
'Yeah... the old me would have truly believed that.'
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I gave a self-deprecating sigh. Looking back now, it was a ridiculous mindset.
If Soichi had come crawling back then and begged for forgiveness, would I have wavered even for a second?
But I couldn’t imagine it. I’d built up a kind of trust—trust in the worst sense—that he would never do something like that.
It was like daydreaming that a meteor might hit the school; it would finally be over, at least for me.
Ŵ е.b̊ ṅо̊ v̌ е ľ Е̃ nû m̀ а
“Hey. Are you even listening?”
“……I wasn’t.”
“Tch. The hell……”
He clicked his tongue and shifted his weight, jittering his leg as he stood. It was a practiced nervous habit he fell into whenever he was irritated.
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Despite his aggressive posture, there was no indication he would actually turn violent. Soichi had a reputation for being intimidating, but surprisingly, he almost never resorted to physical force.
Back then, I’d tried to see that as one of his virtues…… but looking at him like this, the answer became obvious.
Е̊n u ḿ а . і̃d
His overbearing attitude was just armor, never a weapon meant to subdue anyone else. A turtle's shell is hard, but it’s meant for hiding, not for body-slamming people. He was exactly the same.
In all my time with him, I’d only ever seen his selfishness truly hurt someone once.
“I'm telling you to at least play your part in front of our families. My parents won't stop bringing you up, and it's a massive pain in the ass…… Honestly, what’s even to like about a sour-faced girl like you?”
And this was supposed to be an apology, wasn't it? He’d managed to slip in an insult without missing a beat……
“Are you comparing me to someone, by any chance? If I remember right…… was it Washizaki Karen-san?”
I'd told myself to stay quiet, but the words slipped out before I could stop them.
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Soichi's shoulders stiffened—he clearly hadn't expected me to know her name.
“……Karen’s got nothing to do with this right now.”
“So you call her by her name. How cozy of you.”
I didn't know for certain they were on a first-name basis, but it was an easy guess. Watanuki-kun had already told me that Washizaki-san called him Soichi.
“You're damn right. Karen is ten times the woman you are. She's kind, she's cute, and she actually respects me!”
I don't know which nerve I hit, but he suddenly started singing her praises.
Ẃе b n o v_е̃ l Еṅu̇ m̌ ä
That respect of hers probably extended to letting him have his way with her body, didn't it.
“Just so you know, I'm not marrying you just because my old man wants me to. If I'm going to get married, I'd much rather have someone like Karen who puts me first—not some mouthy girl like you who doesn't even know the meaning of consideration.”
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He spoke as if women were nothing more than property. Everyone has their own standards, but if that was his, then I clearly didn't fit the bill.
“But I've told you before. We have our parents to think about. So just play along for now. I don't expect anything else from you, anyway.”
“Then someday, you’ll be the one to tell Hajime-san and the others that you’re breaking off the engagement, is that what you’re saying?”
“……!”
E n.u m̂ а .ì ď
Soichi flinched. He knew he'd be the one to get grilled if he spoke up, so he wanted me to handle it—to end things quietly without causing a scene. That was his game.
He was trying to rely on the person he’d mocked for years, simply because it was convenient.
And he probably didn’t even realize he was doing it.
“What do you think I am, some kind of superhero? You think I'm just going to solve all your problems and take all the heat for you?”
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The words came out before I could even think.
To be honest, I was livid. And why wouldn't I be?
Ẅѐ b̀ n ӧ.v̂е́l̀ Еnumа̄
I was relieved to find I didn't have a single shred of affection left for him, but that didn't mean I was emotionless. If anything, the lack of attachment meant I didn't have to hold back anymore; the words spilled out of me like a dam bursting its banks.
“You don't expect anything? Then instead of wasting your breath on a sour-faced woman with no consideration, why don't you go ask your kind, cute little Washizaki-san? I'm sure she'd be happy to satisfy your immature urges. Maybe your parents will even like her.”
She probably wasn't their type, but they were doting parents; they might accept her more easily than one would think…… though I wasn't about to drop the bombshell I was carrying just yet.
“You're mocking me, aren't you!?”
I’d intended it as a mere scratch, but Soichi—who had the temper of a powder keg—flew into a blind rage.
He stormed over and roughly seized my shoulder.
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“……! Let go……!”
His grip was strong enough to make me stumble, and I cried out instinctively. He'd never laid a hand on me before, but the pain in my shoulder was more than enough to spark genuine fear.
Hearing the fear in my voice, Soichi's mouth twisted into a smirk. His right hand balled into a tight fist.
He’d realized that brute intimidation was working.
“Don't push your luck!”
I knew showing weakness would only embolden him, yet his shout made my entire body lock up.
Е̌ ṅ ú m ã .і̊d̆
The fist he’d clenched rose—it was only a matter of time before he brought it crashing down on me.
The overwhelming difference in build, the difference in strength.
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Faced with that undeniable reality, I felt my bravado beginning to crumble.
If he actually struck me, would I still be able to stand my ground?
Would the pain shatter my resolve, forcing me to beg for forgiveness and submit?
'…No.'
Е̊ñúmа . і̆d
Out of the fear, defiance welled up.
Violence was terrifying. I’d never been struck before, but I knew intellectually that it was no trivial matter.
But even if he struck me with pain, even if he made me taste humiliation worse than that, I didn’t want to break.
I came here to see the man Soichi had become—to sever every last trace of attachment and live a life where I could... hold my head high in front of Watanuki-kun.
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So……so……!
“Stop.”
Ѐn u m ȧ
'Ah…'
Bracing for the inevitable pain, I squeezed my eyes shut—and then I heard a voice, its pitch a bit higher than most boys'.
Simultaneously, the pressure on my shoulder vanished. I opened my eyes to see a hand, slightly smaller than Soichi’s, firmly gripping the other's wrist.
'Watanuki-kun……?'
I couldn't look away from his back as he stepped in to shield me.
“Wh-who the hell are you!? Where do you think you're butting in!?”
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“What the hell do you think you’re doing? It’s not normal to manhandle a girl like that. Apologize to her.”
Even against the shouting, Watanuki Amou fired back without flinching.
He was clearly the smaller of the two, with a much slimmer build.
Yet his back looked so steadfast that I almost forgot the danger; I just wanted to reach out and hold him.
“……!”
E n u̇m̄а̂
Soichi glared down at him with open hatred. If his arm was trembling, it was likely due to the sheer strength of Watanuki-kun’s grip.
From where I stood, I could only see Watanuki-kun’s back, but I could sense him staring coolly right back at Soichi.
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He had the composure of the powerful—the calm that accompanied it... no, that wasn't it.
I knew better. Right now, Watanuki-kun was desperately suppressing the fear surging within him.
Looking at the size difference alone, it was clear Watanuki-kun was at a disadvantage. But even as his heart shook with a deeper fear, he was summoning every ounce of courage to protect me. I knew that.
──I heard Soichi-kun plays tennis, too. They say he’s the best in our age group!
Е̌ nü m̈ а
──I heard Soichi-kun knows a lot about injuries, too. So, if Ak-kun can get Soichi-kun to help him, then maybe once again──
I remembered the words Watanuki-kun had been forced to endure from his insensitive childhood friend.
She likely didn't realize how cruel those words were to Watanuki-kun—how shamelessly insensitive it was to trample all over his trauma.
That was the very thread that linked Watanuki Amou and Shibaki Soichi.
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Watanuki-kun never spoke of it. Even so, I’d noticed.
To him, Soichi was a figure tied to a bitter history—a source of fear and deep-seated trauma.
Е̂nu̇ m̄ a . id̊
